I lost count of the days.

I stopped counting the days.
I don't want to care anymore.

I don't give a damn.

Day 8

Even though it's the number 8th day...

Sad songs are getting more and more meaningful.

Day 5, 6 and 7

Woooooooooooooooooooooo!
Competition is finally finally finally over! I have been waiting for this day since 29427389472374723 years agoooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
I feel so much lighter now :)
Gonna take a good break tmrw and I'm back to study/school mode for a month plus and I'm off to poly graduation!

But guess what.
I screwed up on my competition lol.
Day 1 was great! I completed a task which other teams could not and I scored 100/100 for that task!. But after that, all the remaining 4 tasks were like shit. Really like shit lol. What I can say is that being lucky or not is very a important factor that determines your chance of winning.
It's the 2nd thing I screwed up on year 2011 :)
I only can laugh at it haha.

Now I'm left with napfa on 28th Jan and driving test on 2nd Feb.
God bless me, where ever you are :)
Although I don't actually believe you exist haha.
But I need you to help me, to enlighten me, to give me answers.

Day 4

I tried not to think about what happened on 15th Jan. But I just can't stop thinking bout it.

Tmrw is the day I've been waiting for ages! I hope what happened won't affect me, but I know it will.
It seriously sucks to have such things happening to you when you have more than enough things to handle.

Last time I don't appreciate the meaning of FML.
But today I finally get the gist it.
Well...FML :)

I appreciate those who remember my competition date and who wished me good luck :)
Looks like I won't have the encouragement from someone, maybe the person forget or dont even care bah hmmm :(
I won't disappoint you all and myself :)

Day 3

Life is like hell. Nobody cares what I'm feeling, they only see what i'm doing and what happened.

Is there anyone out there who still cares about me?

Day 2

Tiring day!
Woke up at 6.30am today cos I've to be at sch by 8.15am, cos needa load all the tools and robots on teacher's car and need to reach ITE Choa Chu Kang by 9am for familiarisation. Counting down to finals on thurs :) I'm happy although my team and I are not ready yet lol.
Traffic is bad bad bad today! Every expressway are jammed from 7.30am - 9.30am! I wonder how many Singaporeans drivers were late today lol.

Well I've been trying to occupy myself with stuffs today, but whenever I'm alone I can't stop thinking of you...

Day 1

I thought it was nothing, really. But I was wrong, I cried on the way home today.

Just when we are getting more free...
Just when my competition is coming to an end...
Just when you are coming back to TP for a month...this happens.

I'm not gonna give up!
It's time to woo you back :)

Hahahaahahaha

I need to laugh. It's too sad.
I found out what I've screwed up on year 2011.

SO WHAT if I've worked hard.
I'm back to square one.

SIAN

Bought 2 items online but end up 1 size too small and another different from the picture!
_|_

Sigh.

I cannot do anything right during stressful periods.
1. Mistaken my NS checkup date to be 3th Jan when it's supposed to be 10th Jan
2. Stupidly applied LOA(leave) from 8am to 2pm when my lesson starts at 2pm =.= (should have applied from 2pm to 3pm)
3. Mistaken driving lesson time end up reach the place 1 hour earlier.
4. Walk also can walk unti bang the fence outside Tampines 1.
5. Thought lesson starts at 10am but actually is 9am.
6. Bought clothes online, 1 size too small(the web says 45cm I measure 40cm only!!! 1 different from actual pic!!!)


What am I gonna screw up this time?

*&^%$^%@&*&($(#$&#*($&#(*$&@#*)$@(@)(#*)(@&$()@**$@#(_(*&^%$#@#$%^&*()(*&^%$#$%^&*()(*&^%$#$%^&*()_)(*&^%$#@#$%^&*!(!)&*^!*%^&%~$&%*(~)+_!()()*

(:

I actually can't get 1st January 2011 out of my head.
It was sweet (:

When you love someone, expect nothing in return. You choose to have them not they choose to have you.

I don't know if I'm such a person. But what I know is I care for those I love.
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Meaningful stuffs I found on Jian Hui's blog :

My eyes see the FACT which I assume it is TRUE.
But my eyes only see the FACT and not the TRUTH.

I see the REASON behind each ACTION.
But not the ACTION behind each REASON.

My ears listen to THINGS which I believe it is the ANSWER.
But my ears don't hear the FACT produce by every STORY.

I hear the EXPLANATION behind each PROBLEM.
But not the PROBLEM resulting in an EXPLANATION.

My brain had an ANSWER which I think it is REAL.
But my brains believe the FACT which is not the ANSWER.

I think of ANSWER which is not the TRUTH.
But not the TRUTH behind each ANSWER.

My heart feel WORRY because I am CONFUSE.
But my heart still WORRY despite my TRUST.

I feel the FEAR behind every TRUTH.
But not the TRUTH creating the FEAR.

I think I don't have time to care

MP/SIP Distinction Moderation in 1 week time.
Competition finals and NAPFA in 2 weeks time.
Driving Practical test in 3 weeks time.
NIE application during Feb.

When can I really be free.

Do I really have the time to care about the "minor" stuffs?
No matter how busy I am...I repeat no matter how busy I am I will always take some time out to show appreciation to my family, friends and her.
But the things I get in return are demoralising me.

So what.

Yeah so what.
You can't control everything in this world, Alvin.
I wonder what's the point of working so hard, when every time I get is disappointment.

Sigh.
I guess this year's new year resolutions will be hard fulfil.